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The Gardener's Nuggets of Wisdom

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In my time on this planet, I've learned a thing or two....Here are some of my nuggets of wisdom:  Read more »

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Stuff That Pisses Me Off, Volume 3: Eczema

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Winter has seen the return of my nemesis, my adversary, my ARCH ENEMY.  Read more »

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Stuff That Pisses Me Off, Volume 2: Valentine's Day

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Apparently my first attempt at blogging came off a little hateful. (I was described as sounding "mean" and "angry" by my own mother). So I've decided to take my "nice pills", tone down the profanity, and give it another shot. Given the time of year, it was rather easy to come up with a new topic.....  Read more »

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Stuff That Pisses Me Off, Volume 1: The Speakerphone

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Welcome to my infinite series of Stuff That Pisses Me Off.  Every time I encounter something annoying, unnecessary, steeped in bullshit, or fantastically stupid, I'm gonna rant about it.  Why?  Because ranting about shit that I can't change is what angry loners do.  So read on and tell me what you think: whiny little bitch or insightful, humorous, Peter Griffin-esque demi-goddess.

Let us begin with the speakerphone.....  Read more »

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Staples Business Depot: Seniors' Most Dangerous Predator

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 the Devil IncarnateTo the best of my recollection, it's been nearly half a year since I last wrote a blog. Lt. Mookman needs a certain amount of fury dwelling within him to get the urge to unleash hell via the typed word. Well a friend helped me to realize that fury and today I return to you with a vengeance!  Read more »

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Punctuation is Everything

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This is definitely not original, but I like it....  Read more »

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First entry

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This is my first post on the new system. Really like the layout. Good job iLaugh team.

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Launch (the soft kind)

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<applause>Houston,
we have softLaunch!</applause>

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I Can Haz Animal Abuse?

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Hiya. I’m sure many of you cuddly, little animal lovers have already come across the latest blog craze www.icanhascheezburger.com. The site features adorable photos of itty-bitty kittahs in equally adorable poses with grammatically incorrect captions superimposed on to the images.  Read more »

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Reality TV Causes Cancer!

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CBS is at it again! The network that brought you “Decreasingly Attractive People Stranded on an Island with Nothing to Do But Talk About Food They Don’t Have” (Survivor) and “People That Couldn’t Make It On To “Decreasingly Attractive People Stranded on an Island with Nothing to Do But Talk About Food They Don’t Have” But Settled for Being Stuck in a House Full of Cameras With No Activities of Any Kind” (Big Brother) is now the center of controversy  Read more »

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Schizofurnia

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MouseyWow. It sure has been a long time since our last encounter. I can’t imagine how hard it must’ve been for you and I apologize with every bit of sincerity that I can muster. I guess I just haven’t been adequately inspired in a while.  Read more »

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Top 10 Games I’d Like to be Champion Of

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Marco Polo
According to the Internet’s most trusted site for important and accurate news, Worthy, Weird, and Wacky, Ray Scott, a “burly 64-year-old retiree”, has won the New Hampshire Rock, Paper, Scissors title. Here’s the link: Old Dude RPS Champ. But I think I pretty much gave you all of the important information.  Read more »

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Elizarosie Cat Fight

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Leave it to early morning television to turn great friends against each other. Rosie O’Donnell and Elizabeth Hasselbeck (formerly of Survivor) engaged in a vicious cat fight this morning on the CBS equivalent of a gabfest served over tea and scrumpets, The View. The two had been very close friends ever since Rosie joined the show in September.  Read more »

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When it comes to drunk driving, a Paris better than one

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Paris Hilton Driving
Here’s a True Hollywood Moment for the uncool few of you who don’t follow Paris Hilton’s every move. The unjustifiably-famed heiress was recently arrested for driving under the influence (of alcohol, duh). It appears (from the one article I’m willing to use as research into this matter: this one) she has been tried and convicted and now faces a 45-day sentence behind bars.  Read more »

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Yesterday’s Entertainment News

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  • Trevor Smith, better known as Busta Rhymes, was arrested Thursday morning for driving under the influence of alcohol. MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Driving) consider this to be a horrendous blow to their recent campaign aimed towards keeping urban youth to stay out of their Escalades after drinking 40s from brown paper bags. Ethel Stagwick of MADD says,
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